Parodies - 'Don't Wanna Be a Football Official'

by David Jacobs (Scribe)

6

637 reads

Humor

October 07, 2008

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It's tough being a referee. I wrote this song using the small bit of sympathy
I still have for them.

To the tune of "American Idiot" by Green Day:

Don't wanna be a football official.
Don't wanna make decisions that are crucial.
'Coz all I get is a footballer's backlash
From John Terry who just wants cash.

All the players hassle and annoy me.
I can't even show a card of R-E-D
Even if that's what they all deserve.

Television would show it tomorrow.
Media scrutiny would follow

Me all the way back home again.

I may seem like a f*ggot to all of you.
I do my job, you should stick to yours, too.
I may have the movement of a panda.
That's why the linesmen give me a hand-a.

Welcome to the world of refereeing.
I can't see what the other fans are seeing
And vice versa which makes us all go mad.

Then I call a foul and give a penalty.
Either way, it would make one team angry.
But one goal can't be that bad.

Don't wanna be a football official.
I'm inconsistent with players who aren't special.
Always the centre of something controversial
Then again, this problem's universal.

I cannot always see everything
On the pitch. There's sometimes nothing.
Yet I still decide to stop and blow.

Remember when I mentioned the red card.
Players need to calm down. It's not that hard.
I'll let them off with a yellow.

 

(Okay, that "panda/hand-a" line was not very good, but I couldn't think of anything else :P).

Humor

637 views

comments (6) write a comment »

1. reply to comment by Ricky
   about 1 month ago

   -LOL did you make that all up yourself! Pretty funny though, I can imagine it ringing around terraces in the Premiership next week if it takes off! :O)

   1. by David
      from about 1 month ago

      Yep. Made all of it up (apart from the tune of course! lol).

      I'm afraid my parodies probably won't be ringing around the stadiums because they're too long. lol
      Maybe if they were short and sharp, they'd be sung. lol.
      But all the short chants are taken :P :)

      Thanks for the comment. :D

2. reply to comment by Zahi
   about 1 month ago

   hey. nice to read a parody on B/R. Im a fan of such arts.

   Nice job and the message has been sent.

   1. by David
      from about 1 month ago

      Thanks Zahi. Don't quite understand what your last sentence meant, but it can't be bad :).

      Thanks so much for your comment.

      All the best.

3. reply to comment by DRS
   about 1 month ago

   phaha nice little parody. I liked it. Being a ref is a pretty tough job, and I applaud them whenever they do it in big matches or leagues. Of course, that all changes when my teams are playing. ;)

   1. by David
      from about 1 month ago

      Yep. It's what we all say. If it's a decision against our team, we hate it, but if it's in our favour, we love them! lmao

About the Author David Jacobs (scribe)

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